I don't know what to think or say about this new year yet. I'm just now letting it sink in (or remembering) that 2010 is over and we're on to 2011. I had been in a funk since right after Christmas and this one was a doosey. Thank God Ash had the balls to call me on my own shit and got me the help I needed. I've since decided with a new team of Dr's that I'm not really a depressed person that needs to be on all these anti depression medications that literally make me crazy. I'm a mom with a son far away and it's ok to be sad about it. I had let my GP prescribe what she said I needed without doing any research into the effects of taking these medications and/or coming off of them which is what left me literally outta my head for a week in late Nov when I stopped taking one and waiting a week to be put on another and now I don't remember much after Christmas until yesterday because the new medicine wasn't any better so we (my Dr and I) decided to slowly take me off of it but it wasn't slow enough so Ash took me to the hospital to help with the detox process of anti depressants. As of yesterday all of the medication is out of my system I've got my memory back I know what day and year it is and I've learned it's ok to cry it's ok to be sad I just can't wallow in it. I've also learned that my wife is the most amazing supportive woman that I know. She loves me unconditionally even when I'm crazy. She didn't run away, she stayed and held my hand and loved me through it all.
I know this is a lot of personal information that I'm writing about but that's why I started a blog so I could write whatever I needed or wanted to get out so please don't judge or be harsh it's just real life stuff that everyone deals with but not many talk about.